Back to School and some nonsense

I go back to school tomorrow!!! I'm am so excited for this semester. I have been since November. I have so many things that I get to do!
I am taking an acting class.
I am taking Spanish 2 as a review because I've been out of practice since high school.
I am taking the second semester of General Biology. Hopefully this teacher knows how to write tests so the whole class doesn't fail them.
The Phi Theta Kappa Iowa Spring regional and the 93rd Annual International convention in Seattle take place this semester.
An lgbt club is getting started on my school campus.
I am cast in two plays. I have the script for the Spring Campaign Production titled Carpathia. It's the story of the Titanic from the point of view of the passengers aboard the Carpathia that night. The director wrote it so don't try to look it up. It's a Monty Python type British comedy. I play the domestic servant with an acerbic tongue, world-weary and given to petty theft. Bridget Stuffy is harsh and severe. So basically I get to yell the whole time. I also get to be high from eating berries on a deserted island for an entire scene.
The student written and produced play is titled White Picket Fence. Its kind of like a romantic comedy. My character ends up with the guy in the end. I have to wear a skirt and I have no idea how I'm going climb over a fence in a skirt.

Now on to the nonsense.
Things were going great with Whitney up until Tuesday. She just stopped talking to me without an explanation. I finally got her to talk to me on Friday after I told her she was rude and hurtful. She said she needed some time to figure things out and she still wanted to be friends. I can't even get her to talk to me as a friend.
I facebook chatted with a friend who I met through her and she explained that Whitney does that all the time. She's cool to be friends with but she's super confusing if you want to be more than friends. She told me to move on and let Whitney come to me when she's ready. If it's meant to be then it'll happen but if not then I'm not going to get hurt because I'm not trying to get with her. I still like her but I don't know if she's the right girl for me. I don't know if I'm the right girl for her. Usually if someone is right for you then it's completely different. You don't play games or mess with their head. Hopefully, my one is out there and I'll find her when the time is right. The only thing I can do now is keep looking.

New Year 2011

My last day of 2010 ended up being a good one that led right into my first day of 2011. If the way I spent New Year's eve is any reflection on how 2011 is going to be then it's going to be a great year!
I took Whitney out on a date. I paid :) Some of her friends work at the restaurant we went to so I got to meet a few of them. They seem pretty cool but having 4 extra people at our table towards the end of dinner wasn't really what I had in mind for a first date.
Her friends were having a New Year's get together/party and Whitney wanted to at least make an appearance. We didn't stay very long. It was kind of boring and all most of them wanted to do was sit and smoke weed. I'm not really into that and Whitney knows this so we got out of there. My friend Becca invited me to the party at her boyfriend Justin's house. Becca and Justin were the only people I knew but it didn't take me long to meet everyone else. This party was way more fun. Everyone was so much more approachable and just fun to be around. Whitney looked like she was having fun.
Screw the freakin butterflies. It felt like I had birds flying around in my stomach last night. I didn't have feelings this strong so soon even with Jessi. It's kind of freaking me out. Have you ever wanted to kiss someone so bad it hurts? Like it physically hurts? She wouldn't let me kiss her because she doesn't like to kiss on the first date and I can respect that but it is not easy to deal with. When I dropped her off before heading home I missed her instantly.
We talked when I got home and we're gonna take things pretty slow. She scares easily and I don't want to push her away. We've both been hurt. I've only known leaps and bounds into a relationship because Jessi moved so fast and I didn't want to lose her. Taking things slow is gonna be new to me. Whit is gonna help me and we'll figure it out.

My Year in Review 2010

Alot has happened over the past year. 2010 was kind of a crappy year for me but I think it was for a lot of people.

January
1)Spring semester started and with it came a whole new group of people to come out to. At this point in my life I made it very obvious that I am gay by what I wore. Apparently, some people don't pay much attention (straight guys). It was so frustrating to me that people thought I was straight. :(
2) I was invited to join the Phi Theta Kappa International Honors Society of the two-year college. This was something I worked very hard to earn and when my invite came in the mail I was so excited! :)
Life: 1 Taylor: 1

February
1)My bedroom was finally completed after 10 months of not having a functioning bedroom! :)
2)My 6 month coming out anniversary! By this time I had come out to just about everyone. :)
3) I met an amazing girl, Jessi. She made me smile, laugh and enjoy life more. :)
Life: 0 Taylor: 3

March
1)I was dating Jessi and things were going great. :)
2)I came out to my extended family. Most of them found out over facebook when I started dating Jessi. :)
Life:0 Taylor: 2

April
1)Jessi and I celebrated our one month anniversary. :)
2)Jessi broke my heart. Not only that but she was unnecessarily mean to me. :(
Life: 1 Taylor: 1

May
1)I went to the Taylor Swift concert! :)
2)I tried to go on a date to help me get over Jessi. It didn't turn out so well. She didn't call me back. :(
3)I turned 20! I got a guitar. :)
4)I met another girl who was a ton of fun. However, we weren't looking for the same thing. :(
5)Jessi and I started talking as friends. At this point :)
Life: 2 Taylor: 3

June
1)I got my first job. :)
2)I spent alot of time with my ladybug :)
3)I met yet another girl. She seemed pretty cool at first but then not really. :(
4)I was trying to be friends with Jessi but I was only getting hurt. :(
Life: 2 Taylor: 2

July
1)I came out at work and I didn't recieve any negative feedback. :)
2)Still trying to be friends with Jessi :(
3)Realizing that I hate her and I have a reason :(
Life: 2 Taylor: 1

August
1)I hung out with my friends alot before they went back to school. :)
2)I spent alot more time with my ladybug :)
3)I was talking to a girl, Stefany, for a while. She wasn't honest with me so I broke things off. :(
4)Trying not to figure out why Jessi wanted to be friends :(
Life: 2 Taylor: 2

September
1)Fall semester was getting started and I was loving my classes. :)
2)I started talking to Corinne. We were both interested in dating. Two weeks later she told me she has a girlfriend. :(
Life: 1 Taylor: 1

October
1)I decided to be friends with Corinne. :)
2)I visited her in Omaha and I had a blast. :)
3)I told Jessi to get out of my life because being friends with her is not possible :)
4)I went on a date with a girl named Jessica. There was no chemistry almost instantly. I'm on of those girls that just knows if I am attracted to someone right away. :(
Life: 1 Taylor: 3

November
1)I was crushing hard on Christine in my chem class. She's straight. :(
2)I got a speeding ticket. That was a $114 lesson I will only have to learn once. :(
3)I was cast in the spring play at school! :)
4)Jessi texted me just to see if I would react. I didn't :(
Life: 3 Taylor: 1

December
1)I was interviewed for the school paper and the article was published. :)
2)A girl who goes to my school saw the article and added me on facebook. We talked all day. She waited until 11pm to tell me she had a girlfriend. :(
3)Beautiful little Janae recieved her angelic wings :(
4)I met Whitney. I took her out on a date and we had a really great time. :)
Life: 2 Taylor: 2

Totals
Life: 16 Taylor: 22

I try not to dwell on the bad but this year it kept slapping me in the face. Hopefully, 2011 will be better. I have a feeling it will be :)

Butterflies

The butterflies are back! Oh, how I've missed them.
I've gone on dates and talked to plenty of girls since J and I broke up but none of them have given me butterflies until now :) I don't get to see her until Friday though. It's the only day that I have off and I don't have to work the next day. I'm a little nervous about a first date on New Year's Eve but I don't think that will really matter if the chemistry is there and everything falls into place like it should. I'm nervous but it feels like a good nervous. I think it would be bad if I wasn't.
You're gonna think I'm a goober when I tell you how we met. Well, a friend of mine thought I was a goober when I told her so you probably will too. She is facebook friends with a girl I went to highschool with. The girl I went to high school with is also gay. I was looking through her friends list one day out of boredom and this girl caught my eye. I clicked on her profile and I couldn't see much since I wasn't friends with her but I saw a cute girl who looks like a ton of fun. I decided to message her telling her that I thought she was cute and I decided to be really forward and ask her out. It worked! We've been talking ever since. I'm so excited to take her out on Friday. I found out that her favorite flowers are roses so I'm gonna surprise her with a rose. I'm not sure what color yet but I will keep everyone posted!

Heavy Heart

I babysat for a family that fosters kids to adopt them. I really bonded with the kids and they always ask when I'm going to come babysit them again. This sweet little girl and I share a special bond. Her beautiful smile, her shining eyes, her infectious laugh and the big hugs I received whenever she saw me will be greatly missed. I can still hear her voice and I would give anything to be able play with her at the park just one more time.




Janae Kencia Byford (2004 - 2010) received her angelic wings on December 11, 2010. Janae suffered a stroke due to complications of sickle cell anemia. Janae attended Carlisle Elementary School, First grade. She enjoyed school, especially her friends. Janae had an infectious laugh. She shared her smile with everyone around her. Janae loved to read, color, put puzzles together, dance, sing and snuggle. Janae shared a life of love with her family and friends.
A memorial service will be held at Christian Life Assembly on Thursday, December 16, 2010 at 2 p.m. In lieu of flowers, a memorial has been established at Christian Life Assembly. Janae enjoyed spending her time reading and sharing her life with others. Janae's first thought was always of others and never hesitated to give of herself unselfishly. Funds will be donated to the Carlisle Elementary School Library, Teen Challenge and Christian Life Assembly."

Happy and Gay at school

About a month ago I was interviewed for a piece to be published in our campus newspaper The Campus Chronicle. The author is a fellow officer in my Phi Theta Kappa chapter. I think she did a wonderful job writing this piece.

Open publication - Free publishing - More student

Drama! The Good Kind

This story started on Thursday. My best friend B was in the fall play. Thursday morning during my break at school I caught a performance and I was amazed! She played "Grandma" and when B walked onto the stage in her costume I had to do a double take. I could not believe that was my best friend. She is so amazingly talented.
I ended up going back later that afternoon. I watched the second performance from the wings backstage. I arrived about halfway through because I had a test earlier. I spent the rest of the afternoon with the cast. I rocked at charades. Then it was time for cast photos. The director told me to go put on a costume and I was going to be in the pictures just to make people scratch their heads and say "Who's that?" I found a dress and hair ribbon to make myself look like a little girl. After the pictures were taken he told me keep the dress on and be in the play. At the very end the kids at the birthday party hold hands and dance around the girl sitting on the couch. I got to be one of the little kids! I did it Thursday night and Friday night. I couldn't do the day performances because I had class and I had to work. After the last performance and after the set has been torn down the cast has a small awards ceremony. There's a traveling scholarship (Who travelled the furthest), rookie of the year, Niehaus Award (Who brought the most at every rehearsal - voted by fellow cast members), Best Actor and Best Actress (voted by the audience). I was a late addition and I wasn't even in the program so I wasn't expecting to get any votes but apparently somebody thought I was pretty great because I got one vote for best actress. B thinks it might have been her mom who voted for me. Another kid who basically did the same thing I did got four votes. He was in more performances than I was.

Here's what I looked like:

I didn't have any lines and I got about 30 seconds of stage time but I still had a blast.

I recieved my script for "White Picket Fence" and it is adorable! My character is going to be a challenge. She is insecure about how she looks so she transforms herself into the ideal woman described by the male lead. I have a pretty hefty role. The entire second scene is all me. My male counterpart sleeps downstage through the whole thing. We have about the same amount of dialogue but my part is incredibly physical. I have to climb over the picket fence and I walk all over the stage. I also have to have a conversation with a doll. I have a costume change too. Usually there aren't any costume changes. It's pretty simple. I wear a red sweater and a white skirt for the first two scenes and in the third scene I wear a floral print blouse with my white skirt. I'm super excited about the white skirt because I have one that is really comfy and it twirls. I'm working on channeling my feminine side and I might have to practice walking in heels but I'm not sure what shoes I'll be wearing yet.
The script for the spring play hasn't been written yet. The director writes parts specific to our abilities. I probably won't get that until January.