For those of you know me personally, you know that I am a very honest person. Sometimes too honest. I'm one of those people who prefers to be spoken to directly. I hate it when people sugarcoat things or skate around the issues. I like to be blunt and to the point. Extra words are extra energy that could be used elsewhere in a much more productive manner. My question to you is "Is it wrong to ask for complete honesty from the people in your life who you care about or could potentially care about?"
In my last post I told you about S. She is a really cool person and I thought we had a connection. However, she wasn't completely honest with me about a major issue. S asked me about my opinion on the practice of smoking marijuana. I told her that I have no desire to try it nor do I have any desire to even be around it. I don't have a problem with people who smoke as long as it's not around me. I also informed her of the consequences if I were caught even being around marijuana. I still have to live by my parents' rules and if I don't I will lose my freedom. This was the end of our conversation. At this point I had no idea why she asked for my opinion. I wasn't going to assume anything because I didn't want to make an ass out of myself. I wasn't sure if she was trying to tell me that she smoked or if she was trying to find out if I did. About a week ago I asked her where our relationship was going because she seemed disinterested and talking to her wasn't the same as it was before.
I found out that she smokes pretty regularly and she always has it on her so my wish to not be around it would be disrespected. I don't understand why she couldn't have been honest with me about it from the beginning.
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8 years ago
What you find easy to do can be very difficult for other people. I'm a to the point, up front person too and I appreciate when people are direct to me. Sometimes I get to the point too quickly, but that's just me. I've found that some people can't even come close to communicating in that manner. Bugs the heck out of me but then again, that's the way they are.
ReplyDeleteI have come across many people who have difficulties communicating in the way that I do. A lot of times I don't notice that I'm being blunt until someone points it out. To a certain extent I need to be talked to in a direct manner. I'm more of a black and white person. I don't deal with gray-area very well.
ReplyDeleteSome times it's hard to tell people who you are when you know others will not agree with what you do, say, and/or are. She's a pot smoker and you can't have that in your life right now. I'm an atheist and alot of people can't handle that. It's not like I can't be friends with them. I just can't believe what they believe. So, I don't tell most everyone when I meet them. Not the same with S. and I get that. What she is doing is still illegal and it sounds like she may be an addict. It sux but it's part of meeting girls. You find out what to stay away from.
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